Sweetwater Presbyterian

Small in size, Big in Faith and Love

Devotion for June 29, 2016


As a little girl I had two dreams - I wanted to be a ballerina or a rock star.  Now I realize that these two future occupations have little to do with one another, but nevertheless they were my dreams.  
There wasn’t a lot of ballet in the small burg in which I grew up and I’m not sure where this dream came from.  I don’t know if I saw something on TV, read something in a book - who knows but the dream overwhelmed me sometimes and I would lay awake at night thinking about the grace and the skill of these beautiful ballerinas - of course maybe it was just the neat and fluffy tutus they wore……..
But as I grew a bit and realized that the body type that I was growing into may not make being a ballerina very practical - the dream was still there and I still held out hope that maybe some magic may transform me into ballerina material - but there was a bit of reality that made me think that being a ballerina was a long shot…..  Maybe I should even take some dance classes which is something I never did - but still perhaps a ballerina I could be!
Then rock ’n roll came into my life and while I never really gave up the idea of being a ballerina - I started thinking about that maybe my destiny in life was to be a rock star!
I jumped into buying 45s (you have to be old like me to remember 45s - the small records which played one song on each side with the big hole in the middle that you had to have a special adaptor in order to play on your turntable - another antique device that played the soundtrack of my youth!)  I would buy one 45 a week - just about.  I would get so excited and would take it to my room and shut the door and for hours and hours would pretend I was on stage singing the song.  I realize that this may be more of a glimpse into my youth than most people would like to know, but I promise this personal revelation is going somewhere…..
Now, while I pretty well knew somewhere deep down inside of me that the ballerina thing probably was a long shot - there was a really part of me that kept thinking that the Rock Star thing was going to happen.  Someone would swoop down into my little town and carry me away and I would automatically be a Rock Star.  I even had a little notebook where I would write short stories about my life as a famous Rock Star.  I really wasn’t interested in the big houses and the limousines and all the perks associated with being a rich and famous Rock Star - it just the allure of the stage and the lights and the screaming crowds and the music.  I enjoyed listening to music as a youth more than about anything else I could do and to me to create that music was something that would just be the best thing I could ever do…
But reality being what it is there were some necessary elements that needed to happen before I could realize this Rock Star mania that had taken over my life….. One was that to be a Rock Star I probably needed to be able to sing…. which wasn’t the case for there was no singing ability coming from my mouth (in my mind maybe but the people listening would’t be very impressed….) or perhaps I needed the ability to play a musical instrument - and however much I tried to practice and learn to play musical instruments - it must didn’t happen.  There was no amount of practice that was going to be able to make me good enough at any instrument to be a famous Rock Star…..
Of course there were many other obstacles quite as non-over-come-able but the desire was still there - and even still every now and then the dream happens…..
What precipitated this flash into the past was a sign I noticed as my husband and I stopped in a local establishment for some yogurt…..  “You can be anything you want to be if you just believe hard enough…..”  
Now on first glance that might seem like a harmless little friendly saying that is meant to inspire us to try our best - but I wonder how many read something like this or other similar pithy sayings and spend a life trying or wishing for something that can never be and end up disillusioned and bitter because the thing they dreamt of just never happened— usually because it was about as realistic as me being a ballerina….
If we look to God as the author and director of our lives; if we pay attention to the opportunities God puts in front of us; if we truly trust in the God who has a purpose set before us; if we understand the words of scripture which teach us that God will provide the abilities we need to do what God has led us to be or do - then we will find the peace with ourselves that only God can provide.  The frustration comes when we think it is all about us and what we want and what we want to be, when really all we need do is step back and allow God to lead us into what he knows is best for us and what will truly bring us the peace and happiness that only God can provide.
Oh yea - that Rock Star dream still surfaces once in a while but knowing that I am doing what God has led me and gifted me to do is so much more satisfying……